Angry, Tender Hearts
by Koalagriton
Summary: 2012 Raph x Casey. Raphael finds himself angry and upset at Casey's comments about how April and Donnie couldn't be together and he realises it's because he holds feeling of his own for his best friend. A story about tolerance and discovering and accepting love. NSFW - adult themes
1. Things you said that made me feel like s

"I mean I don't get it. Well, I get why he's into her, she is HOT, but Don's a freakin' mutant turtle! It's not like they can go on dates or anything." Casey knocked back the end of his smuggled beer and reached for another can nearly falling off the low metal garden chair they had dragged to the roof earlier in the night.

"Yeah…" Raph answered and looked away, wishing this conversation would be over. He had said those words more than a few times himself, to Donnie even, but hearing them come from his best friend's lips seemed to hurt more. He knew they were true, they were freaks and there was really no way a human would find them attractive. He gulped down his half finished can quickly, crushed the empty container in his hand and tossed it to the growing pile.

The good humour he was in at running off to secretly drink some beer and hang together with his best friend had evaporated and he was suddenly left feeling inadequate, exposed and ashamed. He needed to leave. "Well, it's late. I should be heading back, see ya."

Casey blinked at the sudden change putting his unopened can down and getting up to stop his friend who had already crossed the rooftop and was perched on the ledge. "Woah woah! Wait! Raph! Wait!" He had to physically pull him away from the ledge. "What the fuck, Raph? I thought we were having a good time? Why are you freaking out on me?"

"I'm not! I just." Fuck this, fuck it all to hell. How was he supposed to explain something he didn't even understand himself. The sense of betrayal he had felt at those words, how important Casey was to him and how he always wanted to hang with him because he felt like an equal until those words fell from his mouth. 'Freakin' mutant turtle', they seemed to echo in his head and all he could do was run away. Run away for being stupid enough to think that Casey had overlooked that in him, that he didn't see a freak when they were together. That he was as important to Casey as Casey was to him. So stupid.

"I gotta go." He pushed past him, knocking him on his ass and jumped. He kept running as fast as he could from those words hoping to outrun them and the pain they brought.


	2. After you kissed me

"We need to talk." Casey told Raph as he forcefully held Raph's bedroom door open with his foot.

"Talk about what? There's nothing to talk about." He considered shoving Casey back and slamming his door but that would lead him to believe there WAS something to talk about and he didn't want that.

He hadn't exactly been avoiding Casey. Only he had. He had still talked to him on the phone when he called or answered his texts when Casey wrote him but he'd been a little less eloquent than usual. Coming from Raph that was one word answers and grunts.

Raphael had been struggling, with their last conversation still ringing in his ears. When one of his brothers had told him he was acting like he just got dumped by his girlfriend it made him pause. The ache in his chest was more than just a friend saying something out of line but he didn't want to think about that. He wasn't ready to face what that meant and how it could change his friendship.

"I was a jerk! I didn't mean what I said."

Raphael stepped back and let Casey in his room when he saw Leo's head turn from the couch and look over to them at Casey's exclamation.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Raphael lied.

Casey steamrolled on, not buying his act for one second. "Look I just said it because it's what you ALWAYS say, but I don't really think like that. You know that, don't you?"

Raphael turned to face him and opened his mouth to be an ass but shut it when he saw how sad and defeated Casey looked. He didn't know what to say. Just let go already and we can go back to being friends. I can live with that as long as it's beside you, you idiot.

"Yeah, whatever." He finally answered and plopped down on his bed picking up a muscle mag to hide his face behind. Relief and disappointment warred within him.

"No, man, you're not listening!" He plucked the magazine from Raph's hands and tossed it over his shoulder not paying attention to Raph's angry 'HEY!'

"What I mean is…" Casey looked around wildly trying to find the right words to say. "Damnit, Raph I'm not good at this shit!" He raked his fingers through his hair and tried again. Raph wasn't even looking at him. "You're important to me, you jerk. You're not just any freakin' turtle mutant." He huffed. At least he got Raph's attention now even though he had a 'what the fuck?' expression all over his face. "You're MY freakin' turtle mutant."

Raphael stared at him. "The fuck are you saying?"

"I mean…" He raised his hands to appease the angry turtle in front of him. "I just wanna… you know… hang out."

"We are hanging out right now."

"That's not… GAH!" Fed up with the conversation, neither of them were good with words anyway, Casey pushed Raph back until his carapace tapped the headboard and kissed him. Well, it was more of a mashing of faces. He might have bruised his lip and his nose hurt where it had connected with Raph's snout. He stepped back and watched Raph's face go from angry, to confused, to bewildered in the course of a few seconds.

He was just staring at him and it was unnerving Casey. "I like you, okay? Fuck, Raph, do I have to spell it out for you?" Unable to stand the awkward silence any longer he grabbed the door and left without looking back. If he had he would have seen a smiling and slightly dazed Raphael sitting on his bed, touching his lips with the tips of his fingers.


	3. After one am

His T-phone rang for the tenth time. It was probably Leo wondering why Raph was so late. His lips left the skin of Casey's neck for a moment as he reached over the arm of the couch for the device that had fallen on the floor after Casey had slapped it from his hands. Casey groaned at the loss of contact and Raph had to agree with the sentiment but he knew that if he left Leonardo in the dark he'd eventually come looking for them and that's not the way they wanted to come out to Raph's family.

Raph's fingers brushed the phone and pushed it further away by accident. He cursed and lifted himself off Casey who had been pinned under him since the ending of the movie they were meant to be watching. The menu credits had been playing on a constant loop for a while now. He grabbed the phone just as it stopped ringing. It was 1 in the morning.

"Just tell him you're spending the night here." Casey said, one arm over his flushed face and his right knee raised hiding the erection tenting his trousers. He seemed to be pretending he hadn't been grinding against Raph's thigh for the past 15 minutes. Raphael's eyes studied him for a moment, trying to figure out what he meant by those words.

After a while in silence Casey peeked from under his arm. It had been a few weeks since that first face-smashing peck in Raph's room and they'd been taking things very slow, to his frustration. Both of them were new at this but Raph had been very prickly and hard to manage, embarrassing easily and stopping things whenever they got exciting. They'd done nothing more than light kissing and a few soft caresses. Some of them had ended in Raph slapping his hands and shoving him away to storm off with a deep purple flush over his face, neck and shoulders.

Until a moment ago Casey was happy to find himself at the receiving end of Raphael's aggressive affections for once and he hadn't wanted it to stop. Usually it was him trying to coax a kiss out of an overly self conscious Raph so the change had him aching for more. Admittedly, he'd been working on softening Raph and trying to make him feel comfortable with his touch all night. He found out Raph enjoyed having the gaps between his scutes on his carapace scratched and he'd been going at it throughout the movie, his fingers feeling out the edges and sliding all over the smooth surface. Raphael had slowly been scooting closer and leaning into him as the movie advanced.

"We don't have to do anything." He corrected quickly. "I just don't want you to go yet." He reached out as Raph looked down to the screen on his phone and caressed his carapace gently, palming the whorls and his nimble fingers finding the more sensitive grooves again.

Raphael hesitated for a moment and then got up quickly off the couch and away from Casey's touch. "I better go." He mumbled as he typed a quick 'omw' to Leo. Casey sighed and got up, turning his body away to pull on the front of his trousers discretely. He was surprised when Raph pulled him in by hooking a finger in the waistband of his trousers and turned him back to capture his lips in a soft kiss.

"I'm sorry, I…" He hesitated, he didn't want Casey to think he was running away, even if he kind of was. "I'm trying." He rubbed the top of his head with the palm of a large hand. "I just need some time…"

Casey smiled realising how hard it was for him to admit. "Hey, it's okay I just wish I could have you here all the time, ya know? I had a great night Raph, talk tomorrow?"

"Yeah, talk tomorrow." Raph gave him a crooked and relieved smile, blushing slightly. He felt a bit lighter as he ran across the rooftops on his way home.


	4. When you were scared

"Hah! AH!" Raphael cried out, his head turned away, chin to his shoulder before he lifted a hand and covered his mouth.

Casey's eyes lifted to Raphael's face, now a purplish hue that extended down his neck and over his shoulders. His free hand was fisted in the sheets of Casey's bed and he could tell from the way his limbs shook that Raph was both terrified and very aroused.

Casey went back to kiss and bite along Raph's jaw and neck, his hands sliding and dipping into the space of soft skin where the back of his shoulders joined with his carapace. He bit down on a muscled shoulder.

"Nnnngh! Casey!" Raphael was squirming against him. He was ridiculously sensitive and every small touch or bite was causing him to make the most incredible noises. Casey moaned against his shoulder at hearing the helpless, breathless way he called out his name.

"God, Raph." He cupped Raph's hot cheek with a hand and pulled his face towards him, to swallow those delicious sounds. Raphael resisted at first but then turned his head and whined softly when Caseys mouth devoured his trembling lips, sliding his tongue into his mouth and shuddering when he felt Raph's heavy breathing against his face.

Earlier that night they had both gone out and had a blast. They beat up some purple dragons, busted up a jewelry shop robbery and wrecked some footbots on the way home. Raphael had been energized and happy, shoving and touching Casey on the way back, and Casey had decided it was the perfect time to push his boundaries a little bit. When Raphael happily followed Casey into his bedroom and let himself be pushed down onto the bed, Casey was certain they were going to be finally moving forward with their seemingly stagnant love life.

Another sound between a moan and a whine left Raph's lips and Casey thought he couldn't get any harder. His trousers needed to go but he didn't dare remove any clothing fearing he would break the magical moment and scare Raph away. Maybe they could get a bit more comfortable though.

Casey shifted his legs and settled between Raph's knees sliding a hand down his thigh to pull off his leather pad. "Mmmf." He pulled away from the kiss. "W-what are you doing?"

"Just getting you comfortable, Raph, relax." Which was exactly the wrong thing to say because Raphael tensed up immediately. "No, come on, I'm not gonna do anything. We're okay like this, right? I'll leave them on, it's fine."

Raphael was sitting up but stopped when Casey put the palm of his hand against his plastron and pushed him gently back down following him with his body to kiss his lips again. God he was so delicate, it was a little frustrating how softly he had to tread sometimes.

Casey left his hand on the turtle's thigh as he slid his tongue over Raph's, his fingers digging into the firm green flesh when Raphael moaned into his mouth. There we go.

He had pushed Raph's legs just far apart enough to fit between them but he wanted a bit more. He got up on his knees, breaking the kiss and slid both his hands over and under the muscular thighs and finally pushing them apart to settle more comfortably between them.

"So beautiful, Raph." He breathed, completely aware of how sappy it sounded but it was true. Raphael with his green eyes half-lidded, blushing and moaning softly, his legs parted and between them tapping against the mattress… "Is that a tail?"

Raphael shot up and tried to tug his legs closed to hide the wiggling appendage but Casey was firmly lodged between them. "Wait, Raph! It's okay! It's fine, don't-"

Raph kicked him off the bed and Casey failed to catch his footing and rolled backwards, hitting his head against the bedside table. He tried to scramble up to calm down his panicking boyfriend.

"Shut up! Leave me alone! I'm outta here! I didn't even want to do this anyway!" He ran out of the bedroom leaving a stunned Casey behind.


	5. When it was all over

Raphael turned over on his bed failing to find a comfortable position to sleep. He was too miserable to sleep anyway. His lips trembled at the memory and he pressed them tightly together and buried his face in his pillow. He and Casey had broken up.

It was Casey's fault. He kept pushing him to do stuff when he wasn't ready and Raph had been constantly running away from his advances and turning everything into a fight. Okay, so maybe that part was his own fault but he just couldn't do it.

It wasn't that he didn't want Casey, he really did. Casey was fun and cool, and he made Raph feel like he was the greatest thing on earth sometimes. Everything was just so intense with him and moving too fast. One minute they were kissing and the next they were all over each other pulling off clothes, touching, rubbing, licking, biting... The fact that he was hiding their relationship from his family didn't help either. He had tried to explain why to Casey and at times he seemed to understand, other times he just got angry about having to sneak around and lying to the others. He wasn't ready to tell everyone yet though.

"What are you ready for, then?"

"What? You know we can't tell them. I told you what I heard master Splinter tell Donnie and Leo." He overheard 'The Talk' Master Splinter had with them about how it wasn't time for relationships and they should not put romance before family. He sounded angry when they tried to argue in their defence. He could only imagine what he would say about him being in a relationship AND him being gay. Master Splinter was so traditional...

If Casey came out to his family and they rejected him he could possibly move in with a friend, April or into the lair but if Raph's family rejected him he'd have no one left. Maybe the Mutanimals would have him but maybe they'd be disgusted by him too, they weren't exactly the best of friends. Slash was the exception but even their relationship wasn't too close either.

"Fine, so we can't tell them but they're going to find out at some point and it's better if it's from us being honest with them than if they catch us in a lie. They're going to catch us, I think Leo is already on to something, he looks at me funny."

"Leo is just being Leo. He's just annoyed because I've skipped curfew a few times to hang out with you. Probably thinks you're a bad influence." Casey had his arms crossed and his back turned but he couldn't hold back a snorted chuckle at that. "Now is just not the time."

Casey's shoulders sagged and he turned to Raph looking very serious. "Will it ever be though?" he hesitated, "Look I just feel that I'm chasing you just to get a kiss. You push me away all the time and I'm tired of feeling like a creepy stalker, like I have to force you to make out with me. Do you even want me that way? Is it just me that wants us to do stuff? If you're not ready maybe we shouldn't... be together." His voice tapered off at the end.

This was a really touchy subject with Raph. They stayed well away of it because it always made Raph become angry and defensive. It usually ended up in a fight with one of them leaving and awkwardness until someone started talking again. They would then continue with their relationship and pretend nothing happened to begin the cycle again some time after.

"You want to break up because we haven't fucked?" Raphael yelled back at him. "What the fuck! Don't tell me I never want to do anything, we've done plenty of stuff."

"Yeah? Like what? I have to practically wrestle with you for anything more than a peck. You squirm away from me every time I try to touch you and when you don't you run away a while after." Casey's tone was on level with his own at this point. "If you find me so disgusting then maybe breaking up isn't such a bad idea."

"Yeah? Well, fuck that!" He roared in his face. He went from angry and embarrassed at what Casey was saying to full blown rage. The impulse to swing a punch in his direction was overwhelming. "And fuck you, I'm not gonna just roll over, spread my legs and take this shit from you. I'm done."

With that he was through the window and jumping down to the fire escape, ignoring Casey telling him to 'get the fuck back in here and face him'. The reality of what had just happened didn't sink in until after he arrived at the lair, yelled at Leo to 'shut up' when he asked him what was wrong and slammed the door to his room shut.

Casey didn't call later or the day after like he usually did after one of their regular fights. Probably because it wasn't a regular fight. The worst part was that he couldn't even be sad about it in public or talk to anyone. For all his family knew he had just had an argument with a friend. He went through the movements of daily life as usual trying to pretend he was fine.

Maybe he was more quiet and reserved but the weight in his chest that didn't let him breathe sometimes wouldn't allow for anything more. Even practice didn't lift his spirits. Specially not when Donnie took him down during sparring a couple days later. Raphael scowled at the worried looks he got from the others and... was that pity? Master Splinter lectured him on his focus and he couldn't get away fast enough after they were dismissed.

That night when they ordered pizzas he realised they had ordered them all with his favourite toppings: pepperoni and chocolate. He tried smiling and eating them gratefully but they tasted of nothing to him. He managed a couple slices before the urge to break down was too much so he left to his room saying he was tired.

He lifted his face from his pillow and moved away from the wet patch he had left there. He should have never started dating Casey. Now he'd lost his only friend on top of his relationship blowing up in his face. It had been the best thing that had ever happened to him, he had never felt so happy before and he had stomped all over it. He should have known this would happen, he was good at ruining things. He wasn't good at being nice or complacent or dealing with... feelings.

His room was quiet except for his stupid snivelling and he tried to silence it against his pillow again. The walls weren't sound proof and noise carried easily from one room to the next and Leo would hear him. He moved enough so he could peek out with an eye as he reached for his phone. He knew there would be no messages but he had to look anyway. He thumbed the screen to confirm it and tossed it away as he started with the waterworks again.

'Stop acting like a baby!' He told himself. He squeezed his eyes shut, purging the tears and tried to take a deep calming breath but as he opened his mouth a broken sob came out and he snapped it shut trying to keep the rest at bay. Biting his lip he could do nothing but turn his sobs into pitiful whines and short intakes of air.

The door to his room burst open and he stared at Leo for a moment before turning his shell to him, and covering his face with his hands, "G-go a-away! L-leave me a-alone!" He yelled trying to sound angry but in between his hiccups it just sounded pathetic.

Leo was on him a moment after, pulling on the edges of his carapace until he was on his back and then hugging Raph furiously. "Raph, you don't have to go through with whatever is happening alone. We're here for you." Leo's voice was shaking and his hands were curled around Raph's trying to pull them away from his face and replacing them with his own. Raph buried his face into his brother's neck and sobbed, not holding back. He clung to him as if he'd disappear if he didn't.

The bed dipped after Mikey and Donnie rushed to the room and piled onto the hug, petting Raph's shaky arms and embracing each other like when they were children and all shared a bed.

A while later Raph had calmed down but they all stayed squeezed together on his small bed, arms and legs entangled, followed by the occasional nudge and 'Hey that's my foot you're crushing.'

"You love him, don't you?" Mikey said quietly and the other two turned their heads in surprise to watch Raph as he looked away. "It's okay if you do, we won't tell Splinter." Mikey gave Leo a pointed look and he nodded in return waiting for Raph's reply.

It was hard to hide from them from under the turtle pile. "Yeah," he said with a shrug and Mikey's arms tightened around him.

"Were you two... together?" Leo asked next when Raphael wouldn't speak further. The corners of his brother's mouth were trembling and he shrugged again while nodding as a tear slid over his snout onto his brother's arm he was using as a pillow. "Did he... hurt you?" Leonardo's eyes got that intense look he'd seen sometimes when he unsheathed his katanas right before a fight.

"We broke up." Raphael managed to croak.

"What happened?" Donnie asked from behind Mikey's shell as he propped himself up on his elbow. He reached over Mikey who was wrapped around Raphael with his arms and legs like an affectionate octopus, to wipe another stray tear and hug him a little more, squeezing Mikey as well in the process.

Once Raphael started speaking he told them everything: how it started, how it ended, and even the embarrassing bits in the middle. He even managed to laugh with his brother's at Leo's flustered face when they had to explain to him what 'petting' was and his resulting embarrassed sputtering.

He watched his brothers sleeping curled up together. He was still feeling sad but without the terrible weight he had carried in his chest the past few days. He realised what a fool he was to think his brothers would ever turn him away for something like loving someone and how lucky he was to have them. He nuzzled into someone's warm shoulder and though he wasn't in the most comfortable of positions, fell asleep.


	6. On top of the world

A couple weeks had passed since their break up and Raph was doing better. He still felt awful about the whole thing and he was dying to call Casey up to hang out but it was still too soon for that. He still loved him way too much... His brothers had been trying to fill the empty space Casey had left in his life.

Even Leo had dragged him out of the lair with him, "I can go look for evildoers with you too, you know."

"Evildoers? Seriously? Who talks like that?" He answered but followed anyway. In the end it had been all right but it wasn't the same. He decided to push Leo's constant need to try make him feel better by suggesting they have a few beers on the roof.

He had looked completely appalled at first and then quickly schooled his face into what he probably thought was cool and composed, "Yeah, a couple 'cold ones'." He used air quotes. "Heh heh, I'm in." He pointed finger guns at him and did the most awkward wink and smile combination ever.

Raph let him hold the pose for an uncomfortable moment and then laughed,"You suck so much at this." He said as he tried to keep his face serious through Leo's petulant pouting. "Come on, lets go home, you dork." He punched his brother playfully in the shoulder and turned in the direction of the lair.

"Oh, thank God! Yeah, okay." Leo looked ridiculously relieved. They both laughed on the way home.

"I, uh, talked to Casey." Leo said after walking into the lab the next day where Raph and Donnie were hanging out talking about upgrades to the Shellraiser's weapons.

Raphael stiffened and Donnie went quiet, eyes darting between the two. Mikey suddenly popped out of nowhere 'how in the world had he heard anything?' and now they were all sitting around the table as if this was some kind of war committee talking about their next strategy.

"What? Why?!"

"He said he was trying to reach you and you weren't answering his calls. He sounded desperate on the voice mail."

The voice mails. He had listened to a few but when it made him feel like shit he decided he would just delete the rest without listening to anything.

"What did he say?" Mikey asked in the tiniest and most hopeful voice ever.

Raphael rolled his eyes. "Probably something stupid."

"Well," Leo eyed Raphael deciding on how to continue, "when I told him we already knew about you two he told me everything. He said he was really sorry about how he pushed you. That he was angry and frustrated and that..." Leo swallowed thickly, it wasn't his place to say this and he'd told Casey but he also knew that he wanted his brother to be happy, "He said that he loves you. He wants another chance."

The room went silent and all eyes were on Raph. "No." He said to the room and he was surprised at how calm it came out. "It's going to be the same thing all over again, neither of us have changed. I'd rather we just let things go and get over it so we can go back to being friends again sooner."

"But some things _have_ changed." Donnie pointed out, not willing to let it go. "We know about it now. Wasn't that one of the reasons why you broke up?"

"Splinter doesn't, we'd still have to sneak around."

"Dude, we always sneak around Splinter, that's nothing new." Mikey added and sometimes Raph forgot how smart his brother was for some things. "It's not like you'd be able to kiss each other here in the lair while he's standing right there even if he did know and was okay with it, or spend the night with him, or sneak him into your room. Plus, you don't seem like the hand holding, lovey dovey, pet names kind of people." Mikey demonstrated by making kissy faces and sparkly eyes at Raph. Sometimes Raph also forgot how annoying his little brother could be. He smacked him over the head but Mikey dodged.

The others snickered at the image it brought but looked away in feigned innocence when Raph sent a glare their way. The look turned pensive as he mulled it over. "It doesn't changed the fact that we're... so different. He freaked out when he saw I had a tail. It was super embarrassing."

"He freaked out or you freaked out?" Leo asked. Having talked to Casey he understood a few more things now.

"I freaked out at him freaking out!" Raph answered with an angry blush on his face. He got up and walked out. As far as he was concerned he was done with this conversation.

Less than a week later he was running across rooftops heading to one in particular where he was meeting with his brothers to see the 4th of July fireworks. It was a rooftop they liked because it was tucked by the windowless side of an abandoned building and part of it was in shadow and hid them from view while still being really high up. His brothers weren't there when he arrived.

"Hey." Casey waved at him and approached as he landed.

If Raph had seen him first he probably would have turned around and left without a word. But he hadn't seen him, Casey was probably hiding in the shadows. This was a set up and his brothers had a hand in it. He scowled when his heart sped up at the sound of Casey's voice. His excitement over seeing him again was completely overpowering the feelings of betrayal and anger he was trying to tap into. It was annoying the hell out of him.

"Why are you here?" He asked as he crossed his arms in front of him defensively.

"Raph, I... give me another chance." He looked around uncomfortably scratching his head and pushing back his dark locks. He wasn't wearing his bandanna. "I talked with Leo and I think I understand your position a bit more. We can work this out. I promise I've changed."

Raphael sneered. Those words couldn't sound more scripted if he had pulled out a paper and read them. It had Leonardo's interference written all over them. "How long did it take you to memorise that shit?"

Casey winced, and Raph turned away intent on leaving things before they said anything else they would regret. "Wait! Raph, look I'm really sorry okay. I was an asshole! But you were an asshole too! You could have told me what was going on instead of letting me think you didn't want me at all, you know? Fuck!" He wiped his face angrily with his fist. "You mess my head up, man. I've been fucked up since you left, bawling like a stupid baby." He finished miserably.

Raphael had stopped walking towards the ledge at the crack in his voice and stood in silence to hear him out. "I fucking love you so much and I thought you... didn't." Casey continued. "Every time you pushed me away and I didn't understand why I thought you were rejecting me, it hurt. I thought it was because I was human and you weren't attracted to me because I was different."

Raphael turned around quickly, "You thought I wasn't attracted to you because you are human? That's the dumbest thing I ever heard. Why would I even date you if I wasn't attracted to you?"

"I dunno, I just thought..." He sighed and shrugged. "Leo told me about..." He waved his hands around vaguely. "Why you thought I wouldn't like you when I knew about you, about how different we are."

"What did he say?"

"Man, that is one conversation I do NOT want to think about ever again. He ended up stuttering and going like dark purple and calling Donnie over. He drew diagrams, dude, diagrams. I had turtle dick diagrams drawn over my notebooks in 'accurate detail'. I was not expecting a turtle sex-ed class by your brothers, man." He started laughing in his annoying screechy voice he did when something was really ridiculous and Raph couldn't help but chuckle with him.

"I am _so_ glad I wasn't there."

Casey stopped laughing and stepped closer, reaching out and pulling Raph to him, leaving his hands on the sides of Raph's belt as he looked down at him. "Look, I know you're different, I got eyes, ya know? I can see you're a mutant turtle and you're not going to freak me out, not with your alien shaped cock or the stupidly long orgasms or the insane amount of cum, you hear me?" Raph smacked his face with the palm of his hand, completely embarrassed by his brothers. That must have been one hell of a conversation. "Are we okay? Give me another chance."

"Yeah," he smiled after composing himself and grabbed Casey by the collar, tugging him down and giving him a rough kiss. They both moaned at the contact. He loved the way Casey smelled and tasted. He had missed him so much. Casey answered his kiss hungrily, sucking in his tongue and biting down on it gently. His hands were tugging on the edge of his carapace trying to press their bodies as close as possible.

After a few minutes Casey pulled away with a groan. "We're supposed to be watching the fireworks." He moved his chin in the direction of the firework display going on behind them.

"Fuck the fireworks." Raphael answered breathlessly and he pulled Casey into the darkened corner of the roof, his fingers sliding under Casey's shirt to touch the soft skin over his hips. As embarrassing as it was to have his brothers explain to Casey about mutant turtle anatomy it lifted a huge weight off his shoulders knowing that he was cool with it. That he knew it all and still wanted him.

Raphael shoved Casey against the brick wall and pinned him to it by his hands and a knee between his legs. "Are you sure?" Casey asked with his eyes closed and his head leaning to the side to give Raph's wandering mouth better access to his neck. "I can wait if you're not, Raph. Nnngh Raph!" Raph was biting along the soft side of his neck and Casey couldn't help but grind against Raph's firm thigh. "Fuck." He said under his breath when Raph started pulling at the zipper in his jeans with one hand while he tugged at his hair to get a better angle with the other.

He didn't know Raph like this, urgent and demanding, excited and relaxed. His head was spinning with the turn of events and he decided to just go for it. He pulled away from Raph for a moment. "Just, fuck, Raph, just give me a second." He gave up on pulling Raph's hands away and just sank to his knees, Raphael following him while he reached over to his backpack to pull out a blanket he had shoved in there hopefully in case things went well.

"The fuck are you doing?" Raph stilled when he saw Casey unfold the blanket and spread it on the ground. "You making a fucking picnic? You gonna pull roses out your ass now or something? I swear if you start lighting candles I'm gonna punch you."

"No, numb nuts, I just don't want to get my back scratched up on the bricks."

"Well, excuse me, Princess." He snorted but sat on the stupid blanket and grinned when Casey crawled over to him. God he was hot with his hair messed up like that and that hungry look on his face.

Casey pushed his knees apart and slid his hands over his thighs, then pushed Raph down onto his shell as he bit his lips softly making Raphael growl. "Tell me when you wanna stop and I'll stop."

Raphael nodded and pulled Casey's shirt over his head. It curled up under his chin and got stuck just under his shoulders and Casey had to sit up off of Raph to untangle himself from it before tossing it to the side. "Stupid human clothes." Raph muttered. He took advantage that Casey had his arms up and was wrestling with the shirt to rake his hands over Casey's bare torso, sitting up to flick his tongue over a hardened nipple. Casey gasped and Raph decided less clothes was better. He was tugging at the tiny zipper in his jeans again, struggling blindly with his large fingers as his mouth wandered over Casey's bare skin.

Casey slapped Raph's hands away and pulled open his fly as Raph's hands snaked to his lower back and tugged them down along with his underwear. "Raaaph," Casey moaned as his erection sprung loose and rubbed against Raphael's plastron while Raphael squeezed Casey's butt cheeks. Raphael lowered his gaze to Casey's hardened dick. He had done that, Casey was panting and rubbing himself on his plastron mindlessly because of him.

He painted a wide stripe with his tongue on Casey's chest and shuddered at his whimper. Then he reached between them to stop Casey's grinding his cock by holding it in his hand, feeling with his fingers from the base to the tip before stroking it experimentally.

Casey cried out loudly in ecstasy startling Raph before starting to thrust into his hands. Casey searched out his mouth to shove his tongue into him hunched into an awkward position before pushing Raph back down. He pulled on Raph's belt and pulled it out from under him, fishing out his sai and leaving them at a safe distance. They were out in the open, this was such a bad idea but Raph didn't care any more. God help whoever decided to interrupt him now that he'd made up his mind about what he wanted.

"Raph, I want..." He groaned as Raph squeezed a little tighter and stroked him with the perfect amount of pressure. "I want to touch you, let me touch you Raph." Raph hesitated and stilled his hand. "I know what you look like, it's fine, I want it so bad Raph."

Casey was nudging his legs further apart with his knees and stroking the soft inside of his thigh. He inched his way up until he reached Raph's tail and brushed his fingers over it causing Raph to make a noise between a moan and a whine, shivering against him. When Raph didn't make any move to pull away and relaxed again he curled his fingers around it and pulled it gently, straightening it away from where it was tucked against Raph's body.

Raph's was shaking and moaning helplessly as Casey stroked it gently, feeling for the slit he remembered from his 'turtle junk master class'. He kissed Raph's warm cheek soothingly. Raph had stopped stroking Casey and was holding on to his body, his large fingers digging into the skin at his hips and his heels digging into the blanket. He'd have bruises tomorrow but he couldn't care less. He found the slit, his tail was stiff and swollen now, jutting upward between his legs, the opening parting slightly to reveal dark red flesh underneath. Raph whimpered when Casey dipped the tip of his fingers in him.

"Come on, Raph, give me your cock." Raphael could do nothing but obey, dropping down into his hand with a strained exhale of breath and Casey curled his fingers around it. It was larger than he thought, thicker and longer than his own, but not monstrously big. He could work with this, he thought as he stroked Raph gently and watched the soft flared tip open slightly. He ran his fingers over it squeezing it back closed, Raph was writhing under him, a continuous rumble emanating from his chest. 'Churring' his mind provided.

Raph's eyes were glazed with pleasure, his hips bouncing in time with Casey's stroking and Casey leaned forward, taking his weight on one hand over Raph's shoulder and pressing his dick to Raph's. He curled his fingers around them both and stroked them together, thrusting against Raph for added friction. It didn't take long before Raph was shaking again, his mouth opened and the rumble turned into a vibrating, reptilian moan. He began bucking his hips frantically, the flared tip wide open now, dribbling a steady stream of pre-come and Casey focused on sliding his fingers over it, pressing it closed with each pass.

With a violent shudder Raph came, his semen shooting over Casey's hand and onto himself. Casey came shortly after over Raph's plastron and he released his own cock and kept stroking Raph gently who was still in the throes of his orgasm. 'Stupid long turtle orgasms...'

Raph seemed to be dead to the world during most of the roughly two minutes he was in this state. His come spurting out in waves along with his strange churring sound that came and went as it varied in intensity. Casey hadn't realised how dangerous it was to do this out here until he realised how out of it Raph was during and after. It seemed like a really draining process. He had manoeuvred his body to lay down beside him, kissing him and stroking him until he was done, watching the fireworks out of the corner of his eye every once in a while but mostly he kept his eyes on Raphael who clung close to his body.

'Welp, I didn't like that blanket anyway.' He thought as he used a dry corner to wipe Raphael's plastron off as he dozed, head on his shoulder and breathing into his neck. There seemed to be turtle come everywhere: over Raph's body, pooled between and around his legs. It was kind of gross and hot at the same time and not for the first time he was glad for that awkward explanation. It would have freaked him out a bit otherwise.

Raph was stirring and Casey kissed him to rouse him further. "When do you have to go back?"

Raph hummed against his lips, a satisfied smile curling them upwards. "Could tell Leo I'm staying at yours, let him deal with explanations." He considered he deserved a little payback for meddling. "Is your mom home?"

"No, she's out til 9 AM. Got the night shift." Casey sat up and pulled Raph with him, wiping his legs with the blanket while he held him steady with his other hand. He rolled up the wet blanket and stuffed it back into his backpack. 'Turtle jizz in my school backpack, nice.' He thought to himself.

Raph looked slightly embarrassed at his sigh, "Sorry about the blanket."

Casey pulled him close and pressed his lips to his mouth, biting him before he could continue. "Come on, let's go. I have a few ideas about what to do the rest of the night at my house." He grinned showing the gaps in his teeth.

"I bet you do, ya perv." He punched Casey playfully and Casey cackled as he ran off ahead. "I'll meet you there I gotta stop by the store to buy a couple things. Want anything?"

He thought for a moment, "Nope." he answered and meant it. Here, on the roof of this building high above the humans who watched the fireworks exploding around them he had everything he ever wanted.


	7. Casey Jones, Lord of Dance

warning: slight dub/con ahead (aka: pushy, asshole Casey)

Casey Jones was being an idiot.

Raph grumbled from the couch as he glared at the human. He was being more of an idiot than usual and it was pissing him off. He watched Casey 'woop' at the new song that played over the speakers and throw an arm around Mikey who seemed thrilled and oblivious at the tension in the room. He turned away when Mikey beamed at him and put his own arm around Casey.

Casey had been late to their Mutation Day party but that wasn't the reason Raph was angry. He understood why he had been late. Hell, they had talked about it before too, so Raph knew Casey was going to arrive a good hour and a half in. What he didn't expect was a _drunk_ Casey showing up and making a fool of himself in front of everyone. He could feel Master Splinter's disapproval rolling off him in waves at Casey's behaviour and it was probably the reason why he hadn't gone to bed at the usual time to let his sons enjoy their free time on their own. Casey was ruining everything.

They had barely even been able to see each other the past couple weeks. Casey had the semi-final and final hockey games of the season and he'd been spending most of his time with his team preparing and hanging out to build morale. He got it, it was important to him so he didn't complain even when he realised the final match would be on their mutation day and it meant that if they won Casey would have to show up to celebrate with his team and be late to the lair. He had been looking forward to seeing Casey so much that everything else seemed unimportant to him and he was surprised to find himself upset at how much fun Casey seemed to have at the other party... without him. He wasn't jealous. Really, he wasn't jealous! Shut up.

Now, his drunk behaviour meant he couldn't be around Casey the way he wanted. Master Splinter's ears were slightly flattened against his head even though he looked to be calmly enjoying his tea and listening to Kirby talk about his work. Raphael wasn't fooled, he knew he had his attention partly on them, frowning every so often. Leonardo kept looking between him and Casey while trying to do some damage control as he hovered over the teen suggesting he sit down or lower his voice.

It had been a bit better when there were more people around but the Mutanimals left a while ago. He had been glad to have a chance to hang with Slash before Casey arrived but they all seemed a bit out of their element in the social gathering and politely said their goodbyes to make their way home early. April would be spending the night here at the lair and she was talking with Donatello in a corner of the pit bench.

The song changed again and Raph sighed and pulled off the stupid party hat Mikey had made him wear for the photos. He crumpled it in his hands and looked up when a pair of ripped jeans entered his line of sight.

"Come on Raph, this is supposed to be a party!" Casey grabbed him by the hand before he could react and yanked him up to his feet. "Don't pout in a corner, babe, I'll take you out to dance." He cackled obnoxiously at his own joke and Mikey snickered beside him. He seemed to enjoy Casey not being cautious and correct around other people. They rarely showed any signs of affection or mentioned their relationship even if it was only their brothers who were present. Leonardo's eyes widened and he tried to cover up the comment by babbling over him about something else.

After pulling him up Casey failed to step back from him and when Raph's plastron bumped his chest he staggered back. Raphael reached forward and steadied him with a large hand on his waist. Casey seemed to take this as an invitation and he pulled his other hand and started dancing with Raph. In front of everybody!

Mikey laughed and joined right in when Raph pulled his hands away and tried to slap Casey's off him and they kept moving to the beat as if nothing had happened. He was matching each of Casey's silly moves laughing right along with him. Leo looked uncomfortable until he caught Mikey's wink and joined in too, looking at Raph apologetically. Even April coaxed Donnie off the bench to dance with them all in a group jumping up and down and being ridiculous together.

After a while Raph relaxed slightly when Casey didn't try anything else, even if he was gyrating and pumping his hips every so often, seemingly to the whole group but sending Raph heated glances. Raph rolled his eyes planted a hand on Casey's face when he got too close and pushed him back while the gap-toothed teen laughed his head off and tried to incorporate it to his sloppy dance routine. It wasn't until Casey reached out and groped Raph's behind, under the bottom lip of his carapace, that Raph stiffened and angrily slapped Casey away.

Raph's eyes darted to Master Splinter who was still sitting on the couch. Kirby had gone earlier and he didn't have that added distraction. He managed to intercept his arm when he tried again and pushed him away angrily. _What are you doing?!_ He tried to say with his eyes but Casey just shrugged at him.

"Jeez, Raph, what's your problem?"

This was not going to end well, Raph was furious and not even his brothers were able to help by distracting Casey and putting some space between them while laughing it off as some joke. Didn't the seriousness of what he was doing reach his alcohol drowned brain? If Master Splinter had seen or suspected anything... He decided he'd had enough. He pushed Casey back once again and stomped off to his room, slamming the door behind him without saying a single word to anybody.

He heard the music stop a short while after and the others say goodnight and head to their rooms. Leo poked his head in to give Raph a smile and an apology he didn't want to receive and tell him that Casey was crashing in the living room. Raphael grunted and rolled onto his side on his bed with his shell to him. After a sigh he closed the door and he heard the sound of him entering his own room, closing his door and then the click of his lamp.

Raphael sat up on his bed in the dark for a while. He felt anxious and afraid of what his father thought of him after tonight. Maybe he would be confronted with questions in the morning, his gut was twisting and he started feeling nauseated at the idea. It's not that he thought he would be kicked out because of his relationship with Casey, though the underlying fear of that scenario was there. He just couldn't stand the thought of his father's disapproval in this. He didn't want to see his father look at him with disgust. This was something so important to him and if his father was against it and made him choose...

Raphael brought a shaking hand up to his face and rubbed his eyes. He was terrified of his father's reaction, it kept him up some nights. He knew he would have to tell him soon though, they couldn't keep up their secret forever and deep within his heart he thought it would be amazing if his father would just look at him and smile and tell him everything was all right.

Raphael's door opened and he looked up to see Casey step inside and forget to close it after him. "Raph? You awake?"

Raphael shot out of bed and lunged to Casey, grabbing him by the shirt and pulling him all the way into the room. He looked around outside to make sure no one had seen him before shutting the door as quietly as he could.

"What are you DOING?!" he whispered angrily at him.

"Relax, everyone's asleep."

"Master Splinter could still be awake! Casey, what the hell?!"

"Shhh, I just wanted to tell you goodnight and give you your birthday present. I won't be long, I promise."

Raph hadn't bothered to turn the light on, not even his pumpkin lantern, and they were completely bathed in the dark. He started to turn towards the light switch when he felt Casey's searching hands on his plastron. "Wait, lemme get the li-"

Casey's fingers curled around his belt and he was shoved against the wall. Casey's mouth pushed forward against his face, he missed his mouth by an inch and got him on the side of his snout before feeling Raph's face with his hands to find his lips and adjust his position holding Raphael still.

Raph bit back a moan, he had missed Casey's taste so much, but he was supposed to be angry. He had made an ass of himself in front of his father and nearly blew their secret in the worst way possible. He pulled away from Casey's sloppy, but heated kiss and turned his head to the side.

"Casey... someone could hear us..." maybe his father was still awake and would check up on Casey to find him missing on the couch. So many things could go wrong but his mind blanked when Casey's warm mouth found his neck and his hands slid over Raph's shoulders squeezing his muscled arms. They shouldn't be doing this in the lair, they had a rule about that and had been following it without a problem until today. Raphael sighed when Casey's lips parted and he lapped at his neck. Maybe just little bit would be okay...

Casey searched for Raph's mouth with his, painting a wet stripe along his jaw and cheek. Raph was moving his face away to escape but Casey put a hand on his cheek and pulled him back, kissing him passionately. He tasted of cake and cheap beer and everything that was uniquely Casey. His blood ignited and he answered the kiss with just as much passion making the boy groan into his mouth. At the sound, he lifted a hand to back of Casey's head and took a fist-full of greasy hair using it to pull his head away from him. Casey's lips left his with a loud smack. He couldn't take the thought of being found out of his mind and it dampened his pleasure even though he burned for Casey's touch. If they would have been anywhere else he would be on top of the boy, pulling off his clothes and probably getting punched for ripping another of his favourite t-shirts.

"Why do you have to be so difficult? You always have to fight me." Casey complained before pulling his hair away and latching onto Raph's neck again, this time with more teeth, just the way Raph liked it.

"Shut up." Raphael breathed out, holding back a moan. Casey pushed a knee between Raph's to spread them while he slid a hand against the soft inside of Raph's thigh and moved slowly upwards between his legs. Raph should be pushing him away, but his arms hung limply at his sides, hands twitching, his body warring with his mind about Casey's attentions.

"No! Casey... we're going to... get... into trouble." The teen found his stiffening tail and Raph's complaints trailed off when he started to caress the swollen slit. "Ahh..." he moaned quietly with a grimace sounding as if he were in pain. He spread his legs slightly apart to accommodate Casey's hand and lifted his own to slide underneath the back of Casey's shirt.

"Casey..." He sighed. _It felt so good..._ Casey pushed a couple fingers inside him and he whimpered helplessly when they brushed the tip of his hidden cock and then squeezed past it, pushing and sliding them gently against the tender flesh.

Maybe they could do this if they were quiet. He wasn't worried about himself, he was a ninja after all but Casey wasn't one to hold back, specially not when he was still kind of drunk. Maybe he could gag Casey. He looked around trying to focus through his haze. His eyes settled on his mask hung up beside his bed and the image of Casey gagged with it brought a surge of pleasure through him. A rumbling churr was building up in his chest and his blood froze as he realised what a terrible idea this was, that awfully loud sound he made would wake up the whole lair.

"S-stop!" He cried out, starting to push Casey away again more urgently and then everything went to hell.

The door burst open revealing an enraged Splinter who took one look at them and yanked Casey off Raph by the collar of his shirt. Raph yelped at the sharp stab of pain from having Casey's fingers pulled roughly out of him and he doubled over, one hand between his legs and the other keeping himself off the floor.

"You!" Splinter yelled angrily and Raph looked up wide-eyed and completely terrified at his booming voice, feeling about four years old. "Get away from my son!"

Casey squirmed and pulled his shirt out of his grasp and Master Splinter just adjusted the grip to curl his hand around the back of his neck and haul him off the floor and across the living room. When they left his room Raphael stood up on shaky legs and followed trying to find his voice through his terror to stop this nightmare from happening.

The doors to his brother's rooms opened quickly once the commotion started and they ran to the living room, stopping when they saw what was going on. Casey was trying to make Splinter listen to him to try 'be reasonable' that they were just 'messing around' and it just angered the rat further. His brothers seemed to be frozen in place while his father stalked to the turnstiles and practically threw Casey towards them.

"Get out of my home!"

"What's going on?" Leonardo asked, trying to get Master Splinter to turn to him. He didn't.

"Did you not hear me? Leave this place!"

Mikey whimpered and looked to his brothers. April was holding onto Donnie with one hand and covering her mouth with the other not understanding what was happening. Raphael limped to Master Splinter and latched on to his arm as he extended it to grab onto Casey and drag him out of the lair himself.

"Wait!" he sobbed, "Stop! It's not... This isn't... He isn't..." He couldn't get a sentence out while he pleaded with his father as he tried to pull his arm away, trying to think of what he could say to diffuse the situation and not make things worse.

"You are hurt." Master Splinter had noticed his limp and Raph could smell the subtle scent of the few drops of blood that trickled from base of his tail which was now trembling and curled tightly between his legs.

Splinter shifted his furious attention back to Casey and Leonardo stepped in the way before anything else would happen making Splinter turn to him. "Donnie, April, take Casey back home. We'll get your stuff to you tomorrow." He was looking at Casey and everyone was quiet while they followed his orders.

"Raph, I'm so-" Casey turned to Raphael who was still holding onto Master Splinter's arm and shaking.

"Go!" Master splinter ordered and Donnie pulled Casey away quickly and out of sight. He turned to his son who was still attached to his arm and gently pried off his hands. "My child, come with me."

"No! Wait, it's not what you think. Please, listen, Casey isn't..." Raphael was crying openly, desperate to make his father understand but not knowing how to do it.

Master Splinter firmly pulled Raph along with him but when he heard him hiss and limp he lifted his son into his arms and headed to the infirmary with a stern look on his face. Raphael struggled but the movement only made the sting worse. Casey must have cut the soft flesh with a fingernail when his hand was yanked out of him. He didn't think it would be serious but it did hurt a lot.

As they approached the infirmary Raphael hugged his father close as he tried to control his tears. He could only explain everything and hope for the best. He tightened his grip a moment before releasing him and trying to get him to let him stand on his own. _You might not want to hug me after this._

Splinter set him down gently on the infirmary bed but Raph immediately got up. "I'm fine! He didn't hurt me." but Splinter's eyes were glued to the bright red dot on the white sheet where Raph's backside had just been. Raphael followed his gaze and then stood in the way of his line of sight flushing embarrassedly and fidgeting. "It was an accident. He didn't mean to."

Splinter's frown deepened. "How long has he been doing... this... to you." He placed a hand softly on his son's broad shoulder as he spoke gently to him.

Raphael's frightened gaze met Leo and Mikey's who were standing just inside the door. Splinter turned his head to them and asked them to leave. They ignored Raphael's pleading look and stepped outside closing the door but staying close in case they were needed. "What did he do to you, where are you hurt?"

"You're not listening to me, Dad!" He hardly ever used that term with his father any more and Splinter's face softened when he heard it. "He wasn't doing anything bad to me."

"I heard some noise." Splinter continued, ignoring his son's words and speaking in a calm tone to him. "When I went to investigate I found Mr. Jones wasn't on the bench and your voices coming from your room. I heard you ask him to leave. When you cried out for him to stop I knew you needed help and I saw." He took in a shuddering breath. "You are bleeding, my child. I won't let him hurt you again."

Raphael looked down in shame. His father had seen them and was disgusted. Of course he was. Would that disgust turn to him if he told him the touch was welcome? For a moment he considered the idea of never telling him the truth if it would make his father love him and not throw him out like Casey. It might not matter anyway, he wasn't believing anything he said.

"No, you are not to blame, my son." He lifted his son's face to him. "Do not feel ashamed for this, you did nothing wrong." He pulled Raphael into a strong embrace holding his child to him.

Raphael pulled away from his father and strengthened his resolve. "I need to tell you something." He said a lot more calmly than he felt and Splinter sat down on the bed to listen. Raphael didn't lift his gaze from the floor fearing he would lose his courage. "Casey and I have been together for almost six months now." He noticed his father holding his breath. "We are dating, Dad. He wasn't forcing himself on me. He was just a little drunk and wasn't thinking clearly. We aren't supposed to be doing anything in the lair, that's why I was pushing him away and not because I didn't want him to... to touch me." He was practically whispering the last words and when he was done he closed his eyes and waited.

He heard his father's robes rustle with movement and he chanced to raise his eyes to him. Now it was Splinter who was looking away, processing what he had been told. "You are..." he paused and considered his wording looking very puzzled, "attracted to boys?"

Raphael shrugged, he had given up trying to define himself one way or the other. They were human terms and he only knew one thing for certain. "I like Casey." No, that wasn't right. He had to be completely honest. "I love him." He said softly.

Splinter shook his head and rose to his feet, turning part way away from Raphael. "I don't understand. You have never shown this kind of proclivity before. Why now?"

Raphael was confused at his question. "Why are we dating now? Well, he asked and I..."

"No." He interrupted firmly, not wishing to hear the story. "You have never shown interest in men before. You do not seem like the kind of person who would."

"You mean, I don't seem gay enough to like guys?" Raphael asked bewildered. Out of all the things he expected his father to say this wasn't one of them.

After a couple minutes of uncomfortable silence, Splinter seemed to reach a conclusion. "You are young," he nodded to himself, "you do not understand yet what love is. I know you have been isolated most of your life because of our circumstances and now that someone is offering you their affections you are confused."

Raphael shook his head. "That's not-"

"He is your friend and you do not wish to turn him away for fear of being alone. This is also why you allow him to do dishonourable things to you even if you do not like them."

"No! That's not it at all! I love Casey!"

"This not love." He turned to face Raphael and pointed at the bed sheets. Raphael's face heated with shame and he looked away.

"How do you know what I feel isn't love?"

"Because it cannot be! It is a perversion. This is not normal, my son." His tone of voice was loud and stern, almost yelling.

"What is there about us that is normal? How do you know what normal is? A lot of humans-"

"Your brothers do not show these unnatural tendencies!" He was yelling now. "You will stop this foolishness. Even if this were a _normal_ relationship," Raphael winced at the word, "you are too young and your loyalty is to your family. Even Donatello and Leonardo understand this."

"Too young to fall in love?"

"Too young for sex! To let another do these dishonourable things to you! To taint yourself with these unnatural urges! To allow another man to penetra-" He stopped himself, not able to continue the word or think about his child that way. "To take his pleasure from your body even if it makes you bleed." He was looking at the sheets again and Raphael wanted to rip them off the bed and burn them.

Raphael fell silent at his tone. He was breathing harshly, afraid of what this was leading to. He should have known it would come to this. Splinter would never understand. If he had forbidden Leo and Donnie from pursuing a relationship with Karai and April how in the world was he going to get his father to understand how much he loved Casey Jones?

"Please, Dad," he pleaded, "don't make me choose." His voice sounded small and broken. "I don't..." he whimpered, "don't make me leave." The tears were back in his eyes.

Splinter walked over to a chair and sat down with his head in his hands. "My child," he said after a while, "I would never ask you to leave but I..." He looked to his son, his pain and fear clearly visible in his eyes. "I need to meditate on this. I don't understand. I don't understand what went wrong."

"Nothing went wrong! I just... fell in love, Dad. Is that so hard to understand?"

"Yes." He rose from the chair and walked to the door stopping and turning his head slightly after opening it, "Casey Jones may not return to the lair until I say. I would forbid you from seeing him but I know that is futile. Your brothers are not to maintain contact with him either. I do not want him to taint them as well."

He walked out and went to his rooms. Raphael didn't even bother to answer or argue any further. He sat down on the bed, wincing slightly, and was left to his misery, crying softly to himself. After a while his brothers entered the room and sat down on either side of him. Leo swung an arm around his shell and Mikey cuddled into his side under his arm, rubbing a freckled cheek against Raph's wet one.

"Don't worry, we'll figure something out." Leo said in a confident voice tugging Raph gently to him.

Raphael sniffled, leaning into his older brother and trying to control his breathing.

"He'll turn around, eventually, you'll see" Mikey offered.

He nodded but didn't say anything and tried to pull some comfort from his brothers.


	8. Dealing with the fallout

"What do we do now?" Casey looked at Raph out of the corner of his eye waiting for an answer. They hadn't seen each other in the past week waiting for things to calm down.

Raphael shrugged and scowled out into the city from the roof of Casey's building. Casey had asked him to come over to talk things through and he risked Splinter's anger to see him. He didn't think there was anything to really talk about, he just needed to get out of there. He had no answers for Casey, nothing to say.

It wasn't that his father was being openly antagonistic towards him. Maybe that would have been easier for him to understand, something to fight and get angry at. Splinter hadn't mentioned the issue after their argument and they went on with their daily lives as if nothing had happened. Only it had, and it had changed the way he fit in the family somehow. Raphael felt like a mismatched piece of a puzzle, crammed into the gap so technically it's complete but it's not, not really. He didn't know how to explain it when Casey had asked. The only things he could actually mention sounded small and stupid and yet they hurt like a stab in the gut. There were dozens of tiny little differences that added up and he wasn't willing to whine about them to Casey.

His father still spoke calm and even kindly to him during meals but there was something missing. He and his father shared the same kind of dry, sarcastic humour and he'd catch a glint in his father's eye or the hint of a smile whenever he said something that amused his father poking fun at one of his brothers before he would pretend to tell Raph off. Not only did the smile not make an appearance since, but his father hadn't told him off for any of these comments either.

He hadn't realised how much his father touched them all, not only to give affection but also in thoughtless ways until he stopped touching him. He didn't correct his form with a steady hand shifting his limbs gently into position like he used to and still did with his brothers. He'd demonstrate the position himself at his side with the same patience as always but the small difference left him chilled. He had struggled to keep from showing how much it hurt him. Maybe he hadn't been able to hide his pained face and it was why Master Splinter had ended their training early today.

He and his brother had always been quite affectionate towards each other as well. Physical contact between them was an almost constant thing whether it was with playful pushes or punches or an arm slung over the other's shoulders as they laughed over a funny tv show. Even if he pretended to be grumpy or annoyed at these displays he partook in them almost as much as Mikey.

He noticed Splinter was watching him whenever he did so now. He didn't actually say anything or show disapproval other than a small thoughtful frown every once in a while. Raph had pretended not to notice and continue as usual but Mikey noticed first and stiffened under his arm. The others did too, soon after that and they all sat a little farther apart from each other, and from him. They probably thought they were doing Raph a favour and trying not to provoke an argument. He hated it.

"Raph..." Raphael looked up at Casey as the boy walked closer to him. They had been sitting in the garden chairs for close to an hour now. The beers Casey brought up were untouched. "We're still together, right? He's not going to make you leave me or anything?"

Raphael stared up at him from his chair. So this was what he had been worrying about, why he had insisted so much for him to come over. He reached up to him and grabbed the front of his t-shirt in his fist before pulling him down roughly. Casey yelped and toppled over into the turtle who caught him before he fell to the ground but not before he hit his knee against the corner of the seat of the metal chair.

"Raph! Dude, ow! Come on, you ripped my favourite shirt! Again!" He struggled against the turtle's grip flailing uselessly. He was kind of straddling a green thigh, his torso half slung over Raph's opposite shoulder and bicep and held in place with that same arm while Raph popped open his can of beer casually and gulped some down with a free hand. He didn't have to look at him to know Casey had a relieved smile on face as he complained.

"Fine, whatever." Casey said as he stopped his flailing and Raph's grip relaxed enough for Casey to get more comfortable.

He moved his legs and shifted to straddle Raph properly, pushing back and taking a sip from his beer while he was distracted, ignoring his 'Hey that's MY beer.' and then handing it back. He also pretended not to notice the glare Raph was giving him as the turtle gulped down the rest of the can before it could be stolen and waited until he was finished before leaning forward to pull Raph's bottom lip into his mouth to bite it. When Raph gasped he slid his tongue into the cool beer-tasting mouth. Raphael dropped the empty can and slid his hands up the boy's back, under his shirt pressing his fingers against the smooth, warm skin.

"How long can you stay?" Casey whispered when he pulled away to breathe.

"Not long, I have to be back before curfew." When Casey leaned forward again Raph turned his head, the scowl was back on his face after being reminded of what awaited him at home. "Maybe I should get going."

Casey sighed and kissed his jaw before getting up. "Things will get better, Raph. He just needs some time to get used to the idea and realise we're not just messing around." Raphael got up and stretched beside him. "He'll see I'm not just after you for your fine ass." He slapped a hand against Raph's butt cheek and squeezed before the turtle could react.

Raphael growled and swung at the cackling human when he spun away out of reach, a grin twitching the side of his own mouth up. "Come here." He said as the grin turned feral, curling his finger at Casey.

He knew Casey couldn't help obeying that voice and stepped closer, Raph pulled him into a passionate kiss and pinched Casey's butt hard, enough to leave a bruise he'd remember the next couple days when he sat down on it. Casey yelped and rubbed his backside, cussing as Raph laughed and headed home. Things would be fine, his father just needed time and he could wait it out as long as he had Casey with him.

Raphael walked into the lair and froze once he was past the turnstiles. Master Splinter sat at the bench and stood up when he heard him enter. He had been waiting for him. He probably knew he had gone out to meet Casey. Raphael swallowed and wondered if he smelled like beer. He probably did. Great.

They stood for a moment regarding each other. After a while Raphael took a step towards his bedroom hoping that maybe Splinter would be satisfied with knowing he had returned before curfew and was okay. He had no such luck.

"You were out." Splinter said. It was supposed to be a question but came out as a statement. He obviously knew or he wouldn't be here.

"Yeah."

"You went to see _him_."

Raphael ground his teeth. What did he want? He knew he did. He saw a flicker of movement and noticed the lab door was ajar, three sets of eyes peeking out from behind. Somehow them being there gave him courage. His brothers were on his side and he did nothing wrong.

"Yeah, I went to see my _boyfriend_." He snapped back. He wouldn't usually call Casey that. It sounded kind of strange in his ears but he wasn't going to back down now. "You remember him, don't you? About this tall, lanky kid, fought by our side since the moment we met?"

"Do not use that tone with me, Raphael." Splinter answered firmly and Raphael shrunk back a little, losing his momentum in the argument. "You know perfectly well what I think on this matter."

"Why is this so hard for you? We're not doing anything wrong! Can't you just be happy for me?"

"I only want what's best for you."

"And what is that, exactly? You've been treating me like a stranger ever since you found out. Just because I love someone you don't approve of doesn't make me a different person. I'm still me."

Master Splinter's ears flattened against his head. "I just have been trying to think what I've done wrong to cause this. You were always such a difficult child when you were younger and maybe I doted on you with too much affection and turned you..."

"It didn't 'turn me' into anything!" He interrupted his father not wanting him to finish that sentence, afraid of what he was going to say. "How can you say that? Why does it matter to you if I'm with a guy or a girl? Isn't it enough that I'm with someone decent that makes me happy?"

"It is not so simple. I feel as if I don't recognize you any more. I never suspected this."

"That I could find someone who loves me? That's what has you so worried?" He was panting hard and his words were coming out more angry than sincere. His hands were held in fists at his side. He didn't want to continue this argument and say something he would regret later. He was already having a hard time holding back as it was. He breathed in slowly. "I'm not 'tainted' and I'm not going to 'taint' my brothers if that's what you're worried about. I just love Casey, that's all."

"I don't believe what you feel is love."

"Why? What is the difference? Do you even love _me_ any more?" His voice lowered into a broken whisper, afraid of the answer. "Why can't you just... a-accept me... the w-way I am?" Raphael squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed at them angrily with his knuckles to get rid of the tears. He felt so frustrated at breaking down in front of his father. He was supposed to be strong and show how mature he was but he couldn't hold his tears back at the idea that his father didn't love him and didn't want him any more. Maybe he'd want to separate him from the others so that his 'perversion' wouldn't spread.

His eyes snapped open when he felt a warm arm around his shoulders. His brothers had left the lab to go stand with him at some point. He should have known they'd have his back. They wouldn't stay away from him even if Splinter ordered them to. Not even Leo. Donnie had his arm wrapped around Raph's shoulders, Mikey was pushing himself into Raph's side, under his arm, and Leo stood in front of him protectively. The argument hadn't been particularly nasty nor violent but they knew him and could tell how much he was hurting.

Master Splinter's eyes widened in confusion at the actions of his sons and he was reminded of when they were first mutated as little toddlers along with him. They had huddled up together in a similar manner with Raphael mewling angrily at him. 'They are protecting their brother from me.' His ears flattened and he lowered his head. 'How did it come to this?'

He looked at his eldest son, standing in front of the little group. There was defiance in his eyes but the most prominent emotion was a deep sadness. Splinter deflated at this, hearing the muffled sniffles from his other child being supported by his siblings. "It was not my intention to hurt your brother." He told Leonardo.

Leo only nodded and softened his look at his father. "Is it really so hard to accept?" He asked quietly.

"I am trying..." Master Splinter started, "but this goes against everything..."

"You don't have love it." Donatello spoke up, interrupting him before he could continue, "you just have to love Raph."

"I know that can be difficult sometimes," Mikey spoke up from behind Leonardo. Raph had taken control of himself again and was trying to shove him away. Mikey was holding on to his brother with all his strength, both hands clutched together with his arms around his torso and a leg curled around his waist with his ankle hooked behind a thigh. He was being pushed away by a hand on his face making his words come out slightly muffled. "you know... mmmmfffgh... because he's Raph. Nnnngghhh... But he's still the same Raph we know and mmff... love."

Master Splinter smiled weakly and nodded. There was no point to this. This was a battle he would not win. His son was naturally rebellious even if he was right and he was confused about his sexuality. He would only be pushing him away and into the arms of Casey Jones. The only thing he could really do was wait it out quietly and be there for his child when he inevitably realised his mistake and offer him guidance if he was ever asked for it.

"I understand." He said softly and a collective breath was let out. He then straightened and continued more firmly, "but you will follow the rules of this house." With that tone of voice they all stilled and stood together at attention, lined up side by side. "You are not to stay out past your curfew, I do not want any inappropriate behaviour in my house or during patrols and missions and if I catch you drinking alcohol again you will be grounded for a month. Is that understood?"

"Y-yes, Master Splinter!" Raphael answered quickly.

"Good." He paused in front of his fiery son and put his hand on his wide shoulder. "I may not like this, maybe I am too old and set in my ways to completely understand but I love you and I will be always on your side."

"Y-yes, Father." He answered with a smile.

Master Splinter pulled him into an embrace and Raphael only hesitated a moment before lifting his arms and answering it with his own. His brothers joined in and squeezed them both tightly.

"Good." Master Splinter repeated with a warm smile of his own, gently extricating himself from the tangle of thick arms. "Now rest, I won't go easy on you tomorrow during training and we will have a talk after practice about the negative effects of alcohol."

"H-hai." Raphael answered slightly embarrassed as Master Splinter walked away.

His brothers waited until he had gone into the dojo before crowding around Raphael. "What did I tell you?" Mikey beamed at Raph.

"I can't believe you were _drinking_ with Casey!" Leo scolded Raph half-heartedly, a grin still on his face.

"Casey being a bad influence? Shocker." Donatello added.

"Yeah, you were right." Raphael ignored the other comments and smiled at his brothers. It was impossible for him to convey the gratitude he felt for them at that moment. "Thanks."

"Any time, little brother." Leo answered patting his head briefly before Raph slapped his hand away. "I'm always telling you guys. With a good strategy and a well carried out plan nothing is-"

"Oh my god, just shut up already!" Raph rolled his eyes and stomped off to his bedroom. He turned before closing the door behind him and shared a happy look with Leo which he answered with a smile and a slight nod. Things were going to be fine.


	9. Hallowed night part 1

Casey zipped in an out of the crowds making his way as groups of costumed people lumbered forward too slowly for his taste. He carried a cardboard cup holder with 6 drinks in the palm of one hand and he was swivelling it about as he changed directions like an expert waiter to avoid splashing the contents as he headed towards a less busy street where the others waited for him. He caught sight of an uncomfortable-looking dark green turtle wearing a dwarf costume and scowling at the crowd.

Grinning when he realised he hadn't been spotted yet he sneaked up to the grumpy turtle and when he turned towards him he planted a loud sloppy kiss on his lips, knocking his helmet back as it struck his nose. Raph jerked back quickly, a hand darting out to keep his headgear on and then punched Casey in the arm angrily when he realised his brothers had seen them.

"OW! Raph!" The drinks sloshed from the impact and he spilled part of the contents over the front of his shirt when he tried to keep them from toppling over completely. "Baby, your brothers don't care if we kiss."

"Don't. Call. Me. Baby!" Raphael yelled at him as his face turned completely purple in embarrassment.

"Hey! I just met you. And this is crazy. But here's my number, so call me, Baby!" Mikey sang from behind them and Raphael turned his murderous glare at him making him yelp and hide behind Leo who had an amused little smile on his face.

"It's: call me, MAYBE." Donatello corrected with his finger pointed to the sky.

"I hate costumes..." Raphael grumbled and Casey kept humming the rest of Mikey's song while he started handing out drinks.

"Maybe you should have worn the other one. That one was HOT." Casey said off-handedly as he dug around in the bag hooked around his wrist to pull out the caramel apples.

Michelangelo immediately snatched one away and tried to put the whole thing in his mouth. "Halloween is awesome!" He sighed happily as he smacked his lips.

"What other one?" April asked intrigued as she adjusted the cat ears taped to her hair band. "Raph has another role-playing costume?"

"Naw, you know, the one they came back in from the forest." He looked off into the distance, eyes becoming dark as he brought the image to his mind. "Raph in fishnets..." He shook his head as he made a sound somewhere between a moan and a shudder. "So. Hot!"

Donatello choked on his drink, spitting some out onto the pavement. April tried to hide her laugh as she slapped his carapace to help him through his coughing fit. She had to turn away completely when she took in Leo's embarrassed expression, eye ridges high up and Raphael sputtering switching between mortified and furious.

Casey snaked a hand out now that he was free of his burdens, intent on groping a green thigh but Raph intercepted and slapped it away before putting some distance between himself and the boy. "Seriously?!"

Mikey was cracking up, now standing between them and slapping Casey in the back as he wiped a tear from his cheek. "You two are SO cute together!" Donatello rolled his eyes and kept talking with April pretending to look like he hadn't just coughed up his drink through his nose a moment earlier.

Leonardo chuckled when Raph avoided Casey's advances again and stomped off ahead. The others followed behind him as he lead the way to Casey's, where they would hang out. He could tell his brother wasn't as annoyed as he was letting on. There was a happy twinkle in his eyes, probably pleased at having his family so comfortable around them both even in the face of Casey's outrageous displays of affection. He sipped out of the cup labelled 'vampire blood' and made a face. "Does this have alcohol?!"

"I think so, I gave mine to Mikey." Donatello answered.

"It's great! I had three already!" Mikey whooped and raised his third cup in the air, toasting to the sky before gulping down the rest of his drink and bumping into Leo's side as the eldest tried to pull the cup away.

"Mikey!" Leo put his hand on his head. "Splinter is going to kill us!"

"Chill, it's just sangria. He'll be fine by the time you guys have to head back anyway." Casey put an arm around a worried Leo and shook him slightly as he drank from his own cup. "He didn't have three full cups anyway, I spilled like half over me when my boo attacked me."

"Shut up! Don't call me that!" They heard Raph call out from the distance.

"Tch, temper. He's got great hearing though." Casey muttered to Leo as he finished off his drink.

Michelangelo giggled and Leonardo grinned back at him, somewhat relieved and enjoying the playful banter the two boys had. He was glad they decided to do this. Even though things back at the lair were better after their confrontation with Master Splinter, Raphael had been even more secretive and nervous about his relationship with Casey.

He stopped talking about it with his brothers and when he and Casey were together during patrols they stayed well away from each other. He seemed to be afraid that Master Splinter would pop up if their hands brushed by accident and accuse him of not holding his end of their strange bargain. Even though Casey was technically allowed in the lair once again he hadn't gone back yet and Leo was certain it was because Raph had asked Casey to stay away.

"Is he always like this?" Mikey whispered to Casey throwing an arm around Leo's other side and talking too close to Leo's face for comfort as he addressed the teen. Leo put a hand on his face and pushed him back when he accidentally bumped into his cheek with his snout.

"What? No. He's just shy because you guys are around. I've usually already been punched a few more times by now." Casey answered in his normal, obnoxiously loud tone of voice. Mikey found that amazingly funny, laughing loudly and keeping himself up holding onto Leo as he tried to breathe, encouraging Casey to go on and ignore Raph's warning glare he threw over his shoulder. "Seriously, sometimes getting a kiss from him is like trying to bathe a cat." He mimicked wrestling with someone while puckering his lips.

Mikey guffawed and even Leonardo started laughing as they walked on. That certainly did sound like their brother. "I get more bruises from trying to get Raph to cuddle than from fighting the purple dragons." Leo covered his mouth, his shoulders shaking, and Mikey had to stop to bend over from how much he was laughing, holding onto his knees and tears streaking down his face.

When Raph turned on them even Donnie and April were trying to hide their smiles behind their hands. "Don't tell em shit they don't want to hear! You're making them uncomfortable."

"Ha ha! Oh, ho, nonono," Mikey wheezed through his laughter and the arrows from his elf costume fell from his quiver when he leaned over too much. "I want to hear it. You never tell us the good stuff!" He tried to catch one as it slid out of the quiver over his shoulder and he just managed to bat it away.

"There go your ninja reflexes." Leonardo sighed and helped him pick them up before he poked his eye out or something.

Michelangelo kept laughing as Leonardo handed him the arrows then put them over his shoulder and missed the opening of the quiver completely, dropping them behind him. Leonardo started putting them back in his quiver himself but Mikey was too busy as he kept laughing and making angry cat noises in between smooching.

"Okay, okay I think that's enough." Leonardo held up a hand when he saw Raph take a step towards Mikey. He did look a bit annoyed now. It's good to know how much you can poke the bear before getting your head bitten off and right now Mikey with his sangria-fuelled laughter was not seeing the signs that would ensure his survival. "This is us guys, we're heading to April's."

"I thought we'd be going to Casey's." Raphael said, confused at the change of plans.

"Yeah, well, we thought you guys would want some time alone. I told Master Splinter we'd be having a party at Casey's til late so you don't need to worry about curfew. Just meet up at April's before we head home, okay?"

Leonardo pat a fur-covered shoulder as Raphael gaped at him. Leo had planned this and kept him in the dark about it. He even lied to his precious sensei! If he had known what the real idea was he would have probably been against it. He didn't want to lie to his father or risk another argument. When Leo squeezed his shoulder he nodded back at him. He didn't know they cared so much to go through with this.

After watching them leave in silence Casey pulled him in the direction of his house. "Cmon, man. Let's go."

"Leo always has to meddle. It pisses me off." Raph said blinking away some moisture from his eyes and covering it with grumpiness but he didn't pull away from Casey's hand as they walked, rubbing circles against his knuckles.

"No it doesn't. He did good for once."

Raph let go of Casey. "What if Master Splinter calls to see where we are?"

"He won't." Casey mimicked dribbling his cup as he prepared to free throw it to the trash can on the other side of the street. The cup bounced off the edge and fell in. "Score!" He raised both arms as if he were receiving the cheers of a crowd. Raph shook his head and started to walk to the fire escape on the side of his building.

"Where you going?" Casey asked.

"Uh, to your window?" Raphael pointed up and gave him a look as if it should have been obvious.

"Dude, you're dressed up. Come through the front door." Casey fished out his keys and pulled Raph up to the front steps.

"What if one of your neighbours sees me and then tell your mom or your sister?" Raph dug in his heels but Casey just tugged more insistently and he let himself be dragged up.

"I'll just tell them I had my boyfriend over."

"WHAT?!" Now it was Casey's turn to look at him as if he were stating the obvious.

"What if they want to meet me?!" He whispered loudly, looking around in case someone was watching them.

"It's gotta happen some time. They already know I'm seeing someone called Raphael." Casey opened the door and pulled in a terrified Raph.

"You told them about me?!" Casey shushed him but nodded. "What... what did you tell them?"

Casey rolled his eyes as he dragged Raph up the stairs. "Dude, chill. I only told them I'm dating one of my friends I escaped with during the invasion. Also, that you're super shy," Raphael snorted, "which is true, and that you hadn't come out to your family until recently and it wasn't going so well with your dad."

Casey opened the door to his apartment and shoved a dazed Raph inside. "W-why did you... What did they say?" He staggered down the hall behind Casey, following to him to his bedroom.

"What do you think? They want to meet you but I told them it was too soon." He watched as Raph sat on his bed, rubbing his face with his huge hand. "Cmon, Raph. It's okay. It doesn't have to happen yet. No rush, all right? They're not gonna push it."

Raphael was shaking his head as Casey tried to pull his hand away. "What was I thinking? You can't just... introduce the mutant to your family! How is this ever going to work? They're going to freak out!"

"Raph!" He wrenched the large hand away nearly pulling him off the bed. "Dude, stop! I'm not going to just shove you in a room with my family and go 'Surprise! He's a mutant!' okay? It doesn't even have to happen for a long time if you're not ready. Just calm down." He knelt down in front of Raph who wouldn't look up at him and put his hands on dark green thighs.

Raphael nodded and seemed to calm down until Casey started squeezing his thighs. "Hey! Can you NOT grope me for five minutes?"

"No." Casey cracked a huge gap-toothed grin and Raph couldn't help but returning a relieved one of his own. He slid his hands over the muscled, green skin and his look turned hungry. "God, Raph..." He surged forward between the mutant's legs and crushed his lips against the turtle's mouth.

Raphael fell back on his carapace, not expecting Casey's onslaught. "Casey! What?" His helmet fell off his head and bounced off the mattress, rolling onto the floor.

"I've been wanting to peel you out of these clothes all night. Fuck, you're so hot." He started pulling urgently on the leather cords holding his costume together.

"Wait! Casey, you're going to rip it!" He nearly fell off the bed when Casey tugged on a furry boot. "Jesus! Can you just sit still for a minute!" He pushed Casey away, shoving him onto the bed and undid the laces himself, letting the furs fall to the floor. Casey watched him while quickly pulling off his shirt and adding it to the pile.

It had been a while since they'd really been together. The last time hadn't gone too well and they hadn't really been alone since then. He noticed Raph getting fidgety and nervous as he ogled him. It was silly because they usually walked around with close to nothing on but having to strip in front of him seemed to have made Raph self-conscious. He decided to take action quickly before Raph had a chance to over think things and convince himself that this wasn't a good idea.

Raph nearly jumped when Casey's hands slid over the back of his thighs. "What is it with you and my legs?"

"Mmmmm..." Casey bit into the hard muscle just above a knee making the turtle gasp, his fingers dug into the skin as he squeezed. "They're perfect." He answered, making the mutant blush purple. He loved that look on him, loved that it was him who put it there.

He pulled and turned Raph by his hips to push him down onto his carapace. He knew it was risky, Raph could be unpredictable when Casey tried to manhandle him but when he was in an agreeable mood it was an incredible turn on to be able to dominate Raph. It was like holding down a tiger.

He managed to get Raph on his back and internally he made a little victory dance, taking care not to show any reaction. He kissed his wide mouth, licking and biting green lips while his hands caressed all the little nooks and spots he knew would turn Raph's legs to jelly. When he felt Raph panting against his cheek he knew he could push things a little further and let his fingers dance lightly over the wiggling appendage tucked between his legs.

Raph huffed into his hair as his fingers curled around it and groaned when Casey pulled it and flattened his palm against the underside pressing it into the mattress to hold it still as he rubbed his fingers gently against the slit at it's base. Raphael was nuzzling his neck, hiding his warm face in Casey's hair as he squirmed and moaned under the weight of the teen's body and his ministrations.

This was how it was with Raph: either soft or hard but nothing in between. Today Raph was soft and malleable, needy and tender so Casey acted accordingly. It was a stark contrast to his usually rough demeanour and he loved to be the only one who saw Raph this way, that Raph let himself be this way in his presence. He didn't usually like to be in such a vulnerable position. He groaned when he felt Raph's teeth sinking into his shoulder and pulled away, sliding down his body.

"Casey, wha?" Raph reached for him but he quickly settled between his legs and covered the slit on his quivering tail with his mouth. Raph yelped and pressed his thighs together, startled.

"Raph!" He loved those thighs but he could probably crush his skull with them if he wanted to. He pushed them apart with his elbows and trapped the tail that was sliding side to side like crazy. _He's wagging his tail._ He bit back a laugh in case Raph took offence, he was still a bit touchy about things like that.

"Casey! Wait... hah!" Casey dipped his tongue into the slit, wiggling it to get in deeper, looking for the head of Raph's cock he knew was in there. "AHHH! Uhhnn... no... wait... mmm!" Raph squirmed until he managed to get his foot under the boy and pushed, lifting him out and off his tail with a wet smack. The sole of his foot was planted in the centre of his chest, leg trembling slightly, and he held him up and away from him that way.

"Raaaph! Cmon..." He tried to twist and get past the leg holding him up but Raph adjusted.

"No... don't. It's... dir- You're gonna get sick." Raphael grimaced and looked away, embarrassed at his own words.

"I don't give a fuck, Raph... I want to eat you out and suck your cock until you don't remember your name and I'm going to get what I want today." Raph's shy look started turning angry and he knew he'd gone too far. He tried to fix it. "You've been teasing me in this get-up all night, Raph."

Raphael glared, the angry glint in his eyes still there. Well, at least he managed to get in a good grope before the tiger turned on him. The image of stripping Raph, pushing him onto the bed and spreading him will last him for a few weeks of jerking off.

A growl startled Casey who had sighed and started to back off. In a blur of green and red he found his room tipping and suddenly he was on his back with Raph straddling his thighs. He gulped, not sure if what was coming would be a punch or a kiss... Honestly it could be either at any given moment with Raph.

TBC


	10. Hallowed night part 2

He tugged on his arms but Raph had them pinned above his head with one hand. When nothing else happened he looked up at the turtle. "Raph? What?"

"Just shut up, Casey." He answered and then he seemed to get an idea.

Raph pulled off his mask with his free hand and slipped it over Casey's head, when he opened his mouth to ask what he was doing the turtle slid it in place between his teeth, gagging him. Casey let out a frustrated grunt that turned into a groan when Raph used his teeth right by his face to pull the cloth tight.

The red mask was biting into his cheeks and the edge of his lips uncomfortably but it was worth it if only for the lustful look Raph was giving him as he caressed the red material pressed into his skin. He leaned back and turned to the side, looking for something and reaching for the pile of clothes. He retrieved a belt which he used to tie off Casey's wrists together and then climbed up his body to fasten the end to the headboard. Raph's wet tail tapped Casey's chest in a quick rhythm as he worked making Casey groan. Tugging on the binds he finally gave a satisfied grunt and shimmied down, stopping when he felt Casey's straining erection rubbing against the back of his thigh.

Casey whimpered at the friction when Raph purposely pressed against it and yelped when Raph's teeth sank into his hip. He was sure that would leave a mark. At least it was somewhere that wouldn't require an explanation. He wasn't kidding when he said Raph left him more bruised up than the purple dragons. It was always like this with him. The soft Raph was gone and now it was the rough Raph left. He wasn't really that into pain but it turned him on to watch Raph lose it when he was like this.

Raphael was still growling as he undid the teen's trousers and pulled them down. _Not a growl, a 'churr'..._ Raph made a frustrated sound when he realised he couldn't get them off past his shoes which he should have removed first. He just tugged harder and ended up pulling everything off at the same time in a bunched up, inside-out mess dropped unceremoniously on the floor.

Raph was on him a moment later, dragging his large hands over his chest and down his sides, squeezing his thighs and pulling them wide apart. Casey whimpered at the rough treatment. He wasn't a ninja and not nearly as flexible as they were. His legs burned from the position Raph was holding him in but his mind blanked when Raph's warm mouth swallowed his cock whole.

 _Fuck._

He moaned mindlessly as Raph's head bobbed up and down quickly. He wasn't ever really big on the build up and just wanted to get down to business. So impatient. He caught a glimpse of green as his hungry glare fell to his face. He must have made some picture: trussed up, gagged and bent to the turtle's will, losing his mind so easily, so quickly. He was so fucking close already. They'd barely started and he was so wound up he was about to come in Raph's wide mouth that was sucking him off so roughly and that rolling growl that made his cock vibrate at the back of the turtle's throat. He couldn't even feel his legs anymore but by the way Raph was digging his fingers into his flesh he knew he'd have large three-fingered bruises he might have to hide in the changing room the next few days.

Raphael stopped his movements when Casey's moans became desperate. The boy tried to take control of his breathing during the reprieve but with his cock still pressed between Raph's wide, soft tongue and the roof of his mouth, he was having a hard time keeping it together. He focused on the burn of his legs to claw his way back from the edge but Raph's teeth did the trick making him yelp when he felt them close around the base of his shaft. Raph drew back his lips in a sort of feral snarl to show him clearly what he was doing and he pressed his teeth into his shaft more firmly without breaking skin. _Were his fangs always this sharp looking?_

 _Shit._

Seeing his cock caught between the teeth of a green-eyed feral beast shouldn't have been as hot as it was but his whole body disagreed as it shook. Raph's warm panting breath made his cock jump and twitch but he didn't dare move his hips trapped the way he was. He couldn't take his eyes from Raph's, caught in his hungry gaze, and the moment he felt the flick of his tongue on the head of his dick he came, exploding in a mind-numbing orgasm into the turtle's mouth.

Somewhere in the back of his mind he knew he was making an undignified whiney-moan and maybe he should stop to avoid being made fun of later but the most part of him felt completely helpless to what was happening to him. Raph released and lapped at his cock almost tenderly allowing him to thrust into his mouth as Casey's come spilled from between his lips over his shaft to pool at the base. He let go of his legs and was soothing the red marks on one of them and holding him down as Casey's hips bucked against him in jerky movements with the other.

It took Casey a bit longer than usual to recover. His whole body was still lit up and humming with pleasure, twitching and whimpering with every touch as Raph climbed back up his body. He opened his eyes expecting to find a smug grin on his face but his eyes locked on the same hungry look from a moment before.

 _He's not done._

The thought of more of what he'd just had made his body start trembling again. Raph kept climbing, moving like a cat, until their mouths were practically touching but not quite. He could smell his own come on his breath but he couldn't care less, he wanted to close the distance between them but the bindings were tight and didn't allow him any movement.

Raph did it for him. His wide tongue swiped over his swollen lips separated by the gag before biting down on his lower lip, drawing it into his mouth as he caressed his wet cheeks. Damn, had he cried? Now he was definitely not going to hear the end of it. _When did that happen?_ Maybe it was somewhere between when his eyes rolled up into his skull and now.

Raph was kissing him over his gag and rocking his body as he rubbed his molten hot cock against Casey, trapped between their bodies. He shifted slightly so that he rubbed against the wet crease of his thigh where it met his hip as his thrusts became longer and slower before stopping altogether. He looked down between them and Casey gulped, watching him. Was Raph going to fuck him?

 __They were going really fast all of a sudden and he wondered why. Before today they'd only ever used their hands on each other. He briefly imagined what it would be like to have Raph come in him. Have all that come inside his ass and then pouring out of him. He groaned at the idea, his half-hard cock twitching against Raph agreeing with the thought and that seemed to make him come to a decision.

Holy crap, it was going to happen. Did Raph know what he needed to do? He was pretty big and he could hurt him if it he didn't prep Casey... or use any lube. They should have talked about this. _Damnit._ Raph never wanted to talk about things, neither did he really, and that seemed to be the cause of most of their problems. He doubted Raph had done any research or gotten advice from anyone about this.

The silence was ringing in his ears, their breathing sounded incredibly loud in comparison as he waited for Raph's next move nervously. Surprisingly, he lifted his knees from between Casey's to straddle him and kept climbing up so that his cock was level with his face.

"Was this what you wanted?" Raph said in a husky whisper that hardly even sounded like him at all.

Casey nodded, relieved and Raphael bent forward to rub his cock against his cheek and the mask biting into it, leaving a wet stripe of pre-come over it as he shifted and brought it to his gagged mouth, pressing against it between his lips. Raph churred, clearly turned on but Casey grunted in frustration with the barrier separating them.

He turned his head away from Raph and rubbed the knot on his cheek against his arm, trying to pull it down. Raph got the message and tugged on the loose tails, pulling the gag out of his mouth to rest loosely around Casey's neck and touching the red mark left on his cheek with his fingers. Casey turned his head quickly, tongue darting out to lap at the head of Raph's cock still within reach and the turtle gasped.

Raph's hips bucked forward and he pushed his dick into the warm, waiting mouth with a low groan. Holding himself up on the headboard with one hand he began thrusting in quick shallow movements. His other hand had been behind Casey's head, cradling it gently, but as his thrusts became deeper and more urgent he curled his fingers, grabbing a fist full of Casey's black hair.

"Casey... mmmmh... so... uhnnn, so good, ah! Hah! Mmmm..."

Casey breathed through his nose as his already abused lips were stretched around the thick, salty member. He pressed his tongue against Raph, causing more suction and making the turtle churr again. He was loving it, he knew he'd like the way Raph tasted. His musky scent already drove him crazy, so different from others he'd been with, so uniquely Raph. He tried to relax his throat so as to not gag as Raph pushed in further. God, this is what he wanted. Was it so fucking difficult to just let him suck Raph off in the first place? Raph was losing it and it made him groan. His cock was hard but with Raph riding his face he had nothing to give him the friction he needed to get off again. He'd probably have to take care of it later, while Raph was in his post-orgasm coma.

 _Oh, shit._

He looked up to Raph's face trying to gauge how close he was. He was churring and moaning and grunting as he sped up. _Crap._ Raph was going to choke him with his cock and then drown him in come. _Death by turtle jizz._ Even if he managed to swallow it all down and manage to hold his breath for the duration (which wasn't likely) he'd probably have to get his stomach pumped. He might have read something about that before. Some girl having to go to the hospital for a stomach pump after giving head to too many guys. Well, fuck.

Raph suddenly jerked his hips back, pulling out of his mouth with a loud pop as the head of his cock flared open. To Casey's relief, he squirmed back down his body slightly and started jerking himself off above him. He shouldn't have doubted him. Raph knew his body best after all and he wasn't as far gone as he thought. His bed was still going to be a complete mess after this, though.

Casey watched as Raph stroked himself roughly. That had to hurt, Raph's hands were anything but soft, but he seemed to be really be into it. He was squeezing, tugging and twisting in fast, jerky movements. The muscles of his arms and legs were bulging in tension, sweat beading on his skin and he was biting his bottom lip in a grimace of pleasure to try hold in some of the sounds he was making. His free hand was stroking the red marks on his cheek compulsively and then travelling up his arms to touch the skin showing between the wrapped leather that held him to the headboard.

Casey moaned Raph's name and planted his feet to lift his hips and try rub his throbbing cock against some part of him. He only managed to bump it against the back of his shell causing him to grunt but Raph noticed and crawled backwards slightly capturing both of their dicks together in one large hand.

He jerked them both off at the same time and Casey felt like crying out, sobbing and moaning at the same time. _Fuck, he was so rough._ He was already kind of sensitive from before so now it was kind of painful to be squeezed and tugged the way Raph seemed to like.

He considered trying to squirm out of his hold but before he could even complete the thought Raph fell forward, catching himself on his free hand that shot out to stop himself from falling on him. He opened his mouth, his tongue sticking out slightly as he let out a roaring churr before exploding, coming over Casey. He felt the hot, sticky liquid hit his chin and start to slide down his neck as it cooled, the rest coating his chest and abdomen as Raph's hand jerked in short, uneven movements.

With the added lubrication Casey managed to thrust against Raph's cock, squeezed against it still in his firm grip and coming again, adding to what was quickly becoming a huge mess on him and his bed. This time it wasn't the mind blowing orgasm that had ripped through him like before. His cock felt kind of abused and raw even though it still felt pretty good. He was more than satisfied as he laid under Raph, absent to the world, and waited for his boyfriend to finish coming on him while hoping not to get too cold process. He had a good view to entertain him meanwhile.

Raph's body stopped shaking after a minute or two and he slumped onto Casey's come-covered body. He didn't hold his weight off the teen and Casey found himself having to take short shallow breaths as he was crushed under the turtle. He didn't try to move him though, not until Raph was ready. As long as he could actually breathe he could endure it a while longer. His arms were a different matter, he could barely feel them any more and his hands were tingling and freezing.

"Raph, untie me."

It took a moment for the turtle to respond. He nuzzled the boy's cheek and lifted an arm to pull the bindings loose. Casey's arms flopped down onto the bed and as soon as he could use them he wrapped them around Raph. He pushed the turtle a bit on his side and squirmed until he was only partly crushed and assessed the mess.

There seemed to be come everywhere, like they had rolled in it and then spread it on his bed. He bit back a sigh. Raph was a furnace right now but they would be getting cold and they really needed to take a shower and put most of his bedding in the washing machine. He'd probably have to rouse the turtle soon if he didn't want his mattress to be soaked as well. Raph was already nuzzling and biting into his cheek again. He didn't want to interrupt him when he was so vulnerable and docile.

He really enjoyed Raph like this, soft and happy after sex but he knew better than to say anything and break the spell. Maybe they could just stay like this a while longer. He shifted until he reached the edge of the cover and folded it over them like a reptilian/human burrito. He touched a freezing toe to the turtle's calf and Raph moved his legs slightly until the cold feet were under his own and then curled an arm against the boy's exposed side covering as much skin as possible. Casey drew back a bit to look at Raph's face and a green eye opened slightly to regard him sleepily before burying into his neck to doze off. Casey fell asleep shortly after, a happy smile on his face.


End file.
